Thursday, May 7, 2009

14 months today

Another month of your life has slipped by without your family.
I never in my wildest imagination could have predicted how painful this part of the wait would be.
We're surrounded by your photos and images of who we think you might be. I wonder if you can sense that you have wiggled down deep into 5 strangers hearts on the other side of the world. My heart aches in places I didn't know existed knowing that your little world is being turned upside down with the possible transition from your foster family to the orphanage. I hate what this process is doing to you and I'm saddened that 14 months have gone by, time we can never get back. I promise that we will do our best to fill those voids in your life.
Hold tight baby girl,
Mommy & Daddy are coming to bring you home just as fast as we can.

21 comments:

Luna said...

This waiting is just so wrong...I have no other words. Well, I do, just wouldn't keep your blog PG rated.

Debra said...

When you first get her in your arms, hug her for me.

Dawn and Dale said...

Happy 14 mths Emerson!!! Your family loves you SO MUCH and you have no idea how awesome of a life you are about to have!!! :D I can't wait to see you in their arms!!!!

skm said...

Tears....of joy for the love you express and share with all of us on your blog. More tears....for the sadness I/we all feel for you during this unbearable wait.
Make us smile and jump for joy with the arrival of your TA!
Sharon

Liene said...

I wish I could understand and feel what you feel since I too am waiting to bring home our little girl who will be 15 months this Sunday. However I guess in my case although I feel for what she's lost in the first 15 months of her life, I look forward more to everything she'll have and be able to do for the rest of her life.

There are milestones I've missed - crawling, cutting of teeth, 1st smile, etc. But then I put myself in our son's birth mother's shoes and realize those are all things she missed too. She's missing out on everything. There's only some things I've missed out on and look forward to everything I won't.

Hope that wasn't too confusing.

Happy 14 months Emerson!!

Anonymous said...

Why don't they transition from foster family to you? seems so cruel

RamblingMother said...

I know you have been told that the babies go back to the orphanage at referral or before you come but I am not so sure that is totally true. She is probably with the foster family until the day or so before you get to meet her. They told us the same but when we got there they said it had happened that morning or the day before for travel purposes. In other words, this wait is hard too so don't add to your stress thinking that she is going through another separate transition based on what you have heard or what others have been told. It is very hard to describe the pain of waiting with a picture until you have been there as you now see. It all sucks but once you hold her some (not all) of the pain of the wait will be distant memories.

M :-) said...

The wait for referral is really hard, but the wait for travel is nearly unbearable. You have their picture - you know what they look like - you know that they are real ... and there isn't anything you can do about it. Soon you will hold your baby girl in your arms, and what a sweet moment that will be. (((hugs))) Thinking about you.

Special K said...

There's nothing I can say that will make this hurt less. Just know that Eme has lots of aunties wishing her home right now, too.

Sandra said...

I know waiting is hard, but waiting like this after an already excruciatingly long wait for Eme's referral must be beyond painful and I am sad for you...

3 Peanuts said...

Happy 14 months Emerson. Here's hoping for TA anyday!!!

Operationtigerlily said...

My heart breaks for you......

Yes, this is wrong. Wrong on so many levels. I hope your TA comes lightning fast and you and your daughter are together soon, and FOREVER.

Suzie said...

I'm sorry you are still waiting and I'm praying for TA to arrive ASAP!!!!

Briana's Mom said...

It broke my heart knowing that Briana had to transition from foster family to orphanage then to us. You can see the fear on Bri's face on Gotcha Day. Soon, you will be able to wipe the tears away from your baby girl's face like I do Briana's.

Happy 14 months sweet E.

Marla said...

Awwwww, happy 14 months sweet baby. I'm so sorry that the wait continues. I pray your TA comes soon. {hugs}

A Beautiful Mess said...

Sorry T. Hoping you hear news soon.
xo
mare

ps
chris sent you the travel info around the time you were looking for help for your visas. Let me know if you need it again.

Shari U said...

You're absolutely right when you say this is the hardest part. I remember it very well and I threw the biggest fit of my life over it one night. Soon you'll have that little girl in your arms and all will be right in your world. Hoping that TA comes very, very soon and you'll be on your way.

Half Gaelic, Half Garlic! said...

I am so sorry you still don't have that TA in your hands....better yet, Miss Emerson. I hope it comes very soon!

Lisa

Meg said...

Just when you think you've felt it all- you find your pain/sadness/longing etc. can get bigger and deeper- I'm so sorry- for your family here and your precious little girl. This is so hard- we held Eva-Kate's picture for 10 months and everyday was worse than the one before it....how are we capable of loving someone so much when we've never met them?.....I wish you the fastest next few weeks- I hope she is in your arms soon.....good luck. we'll be keeping all 6 of you in our prayers....
Meg

Isabella's Mommy and Daddy said...

Happy 14 months Emerson...
Your family is sooo waiting for you girly..
And you will have the best years of your life ahead of you..
Give her hugs for me...
"BIG HUGS".

Kayce said...

I can't wait to see her in your arms! I'm praying she is surrounded by all of you before another month passes. Hugs T.