Monday, May 25, 2009

Thoughts From Nanchang

I wrote a long post out last night and when I hit the send button, my internet connection was lost. There is no getting to blogger from here. It seems to be completely blocked from every server I try, so I'm forwarding it all to the back up blogging crew and have no idea what they are actually long as they don't hijack my blog and pimp it up, we're golden!

(Hey you can trust us T. ;)
We're saving the unicorns and ladybugs for the grand finale.

Signed... a mystery blogger. LOL!)

*We arrived at the hotel at 3:15 on Sunday and the Shangrao babies were already here. I didn't have time to think. We barely got the gifts thrown together before we were running back downstairs to meet our girl. In my mind, I remember somebody totally different bringing me my girl. It was only in the video review that I saw that indeed it was Eme's foster parents that made the long journey in to the city to bring her to me. I'm so sad I missed the opportunity to talk with them and thank them for loving my girl till we arrived. I really wanted them to know how loved she is. I would have liked their photo. I just didn't know. It was a whole messed up beautiful scene going on around me and the only thing I could see was my daughter. The room went blank and that was our moment, only ours. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. Also in the review of tapes, they gave me a a silver bracelet with balls as a parting gift to Emerson. I know some of you have bought them but I have no idea what the meaning behind this is though. I know they shaved the back of her head to wish her a long life. I guess that goes back to a tradition through the ages. As crazy as it looks on her, I find it very sweet of the foster family. Her hair will grow in no time.

*We met with a nanny from the orphanage yesterday and my head was a tad more clear. I was able to ask several questions and rec'd the word that indeed my girl stayed with her foster family until they brought her to me, which is conflicting from what I was told 2 weeks ago and that was wonderful to hear. She only spent the first 3 months in the orphanage where she went to live with an older couple. Her neighbor was foster parents to another baby in our group and they were neighbors and played together. The other foster family had siblings and grandparents and I guess Ems spent some time with them as well. The 2 babies don't seem to connect though when we put them together.

*Nobody in this city can drive. It is the craziest thing we've ever seen. Nobody pays attention to the road lines or signs. They told us we could take a cab anywhere we want, just close your eyes and hang on and they'll get you there. We haven't tempted fate yet. Driving is a big game of chicken to them and they honk all.the.time.

*My sweet girl has a very sweet disposition and she's very funny as well. She does love for you to play with her and she will be ready with a smile. She likes attention and we are her audience. She is very happy.

*She loves the Ergo and I refuse to use the stroller. We used it once to shove to the grocery store to carry our goods back in, but Ems stayed close to me. She spends most of the time staring up at me and I wouldn't trade those moments for nothing. She stares at me and I kiss her little head and then she'll lay her head back down on my chest.

*I hold the back of her head close when going through people or stores. The Chinese people are very curious as to why I have her and I feel like yelling, "she's mine, you had your chance back off."

*Speaking of people, they are everywhere and they don't give a hoot about personal space. I about had an anxiety attack in the elevator when we were coming down from the 26th floor of the "Pay the Piper" building and it stopped at every floor for more people to get in. I was in the back and the tears started rolling. I was having a full blown anxiety attack. Too many people in one small spot and it was beyond my emotional capability to handle another foot stepping in. J was fanning me and telling me it's okay, it's okay, we're almost there. Scared the crap out of me.

*As happy as Emerson is, she has moments of sadness that will wash over her. It seems to be if I get up. She needs me by her 100% of the time. She still will not go to J and he's doing his part well though. He makes her laugh and she loves to wave at him, but only when she's in my arms or I'm right beside her on the bed. She is really sweet.

*She has not cried once. We have no idea what she sounds like when she cries. I'm sure she'll be letting it all out soon, but when these moments of sadness wash over her, I simply pull her close and tell her I love her over and over in Chinese.

*She doesn't respond to her Chinese name, so I asked the nanny and they said that her foster family usually called her "baby" in Chinese.

*I had the funniest conversation of my life in the "Maxi Pad aisle" of the store...
Though I prepared myself for the monthly friend visit, I was thinking I would need some more Tampons. There are tons of maxi pads to choose from. So I was trying to explain to my guides that I wanted tampons, not maxi pads. They said to me, "These items are for the period, I think that's what you need." I pulled one out of my bag and showed it to the girls. They giggled like middle school boys would and then I explained that we have those in America as well, but we don't really use those. I found a box of OB's and said this is what I want! She asked me if those really work? I said yes, they were the bomb, gave a thumbs up and walked away. J and I laughed as we left 2 women standing in the maxi pad aisle reading the back of the OB box and giggling. Funny stuff I tell ya!


3 Peanuts said...

I loved reading all about your day and Miss E...I am thrilled for you that she has not cried yet. That is awesome. Sorry about the sadness...I would see that in Kate as she was going to sleep at night. She was in foster care too. LOL at the tampon conversation:)

I am just so happy for you T. I know this is all your dreams come true!

PIPO said...

Ah yes, I got a kick out of the 'lady care' display at Wal-Mart ;0)

Yes, the driving is something to behold. I was trying to find out how to get stats on traffic accidents....nosy. Surprisingly, although I couldn't get the facts and figures, the accidents just don't seem that common.

The 'personal space' issue was hard for me at first too. Just a completely different cultural view to be sure. I remember saying on the very elevator that you speak of that I am sure people have gotten pregnant with more distance between them!

Still so, I loved China and the people (not so much the smells, though. Never did get accustomed to those).

Glad Eme is digging the Ergo. My girl had little use for it. She found it far too confining. Hence, why I walk like Quasimodo now because I often just carry her.

Enjoy. I look forward to hearing when J gets his moment in the sun with his girl. In time, in time.

Isabella's Mommy and Daddy said...

Sounds like you have had been doing really well..
I am not ready for the space thing.. Glad to hear that Emerson is doing sooo well..
She will go to Daddy soon..
The tampon thing is funny.. I know that will happen to me also..everywhere I go it happens..
Have a great day..
Can't wait to see more photos and hear more ..
Emerson looks sooo tiny.. what size clothes is she wearing..????

Colleen said...

So wonderful reading details about everything!! Sounds like Emerson is doing sooo well. The sadness is to be expected,I know it is hard though. Faith did not cry the first few days and when she finally did we were actually relieved. We felt like she was finally comfortable to show emotions.
Ohhhh you poor thing on the elevator!!! I would have had an attack too!
Can't wait to hear more........

A Beautiful Mess said...

Sounds like things are going well.

I couldn't take being stared at ALL the the 4th day I was done. Hannah (10 at the time) said "mom, just pretend you are Hannah Montana" Still didn't work. We took cabs everywhere in Shanxi, and they drove crazy!

Wait until you get home and Eme has a captive audience of 5!!

Enjoy your time!


Buckeyes & Eggrolls said...

Sounds like your girl is doing great. Maddy never cried... not once. Infact, I don't recall her crying until we got home and had to tell her no about something. The tears welled up in her eyes but she didn't want to let them go. Then she blinked and a little river ran down her face.
I too had anxiety about all the people. Especially when they were touching us. We got caught up in the middle of a crowd of people. They were all starring, touching and surrounding us with Maddy in our arms. They were asking questions too I assumed but our guide did nothing. :0( Very nerve racking!
To funny about the "for the period" products. :0)

Luna said...

It's sad that you weren't able to speak with the foster family, but I can only imagine how crazy it gets when they start bringing in the babies. I'm sure we will be lucky if we even remember to turn on our camera!

Not looking forward to people in my personal space...I have a few anxiety issues myself.

Note to self: bring more than enough tampons.

Truly Blessed said...

Personal space in China - a contradiction in terms if ever there was one! I found Nanchang to be the worst when it came to lack of PS, but the elevators EVERYWHERE were the worst of the worst.

I had one of those moments when our group got split into two elevators and I panicked when I couldn't find my 2 1/2 year old (I was holding the baby) -- she was completely safe on the other elevator with my sister, but I panicked nonetheless (until I could see her with my own eyes), what a terrible moment.

And yes, both of my girls were velcro babies and it was horrible when they weren't touching Mommy. Made for a couple of rough weeks, but great bonding.

Enjoy your journey, I'm guessing you're off to see the Ten Wang Pavillion today? Note: if you see some porcelain you LOVE there, buy it, regardless of what your guide says. The prices at the Porcelain Store your guide will take you to are not nearly as good as the shops at the TWP.

Hope you sleep well tonight!

(mom to 3 teenage sons and 2 terrific toddlers!)

Colleen said...

OMG, T - it is like my trip all over again! Hannah didn't cry, I think until the medical exam. She never cried on any of the planes... and she got VERY upset if I left the room to take a shower..but didn't cry - just shut down. She had a tough time with Jim as well - that took a while - toward the very end of the trip she warmed up.

Personal space? Elevator? Not cool stuff - freaked me out too. And we didn't get into cab once. No way was I going to do that. Nope.

You sick of the food yet? Is she eating well? Gosh I miss you guys. I am so happy to have read a post from you. I so love seeing the pictures and do want more - but I love hearing about your trip.

Enjoy every second my friends. Before you know it you will be home - and although I am sure you can't wait to get her will miss it when you leave.

Hugs and smooches.

thegreybullet said...

I am sorry you weren't able to speak with the Foster Family. I remember when we got our daughter, everything else didn't matter and all your heard and saw was that precious daughter in your arms. It is such a sureal moment it is hard to remember anything other than the joy that washes over you.

PS in China is a joke! Try and stay in the front corner so you at least get a little break when the doors open.

I love hearing how are you doing.

LaLa said...

Too funny...didn't have that issue in China but did in Vietnam..wasn't prepared and had to really search for tampons : )

sounds like she is doing great...I so miss China!! I really miss the people (they love babies so much) and the yummy food. I remember everyone wanted to touch Annslee too. We were the opposite as she wouldn't let ME touch her the first week...cried if Daddy was out of sight...sucked for me but she is a totally Mama's girl now : )

Jennifer said...

I have been away from the computer all weekend and haven't had a chance to comment. Emerson is beautiful!!!
I busted out laughing reading your tampon story. Toooo funny!!

Pug Mama said...

I swear to you - I began to sweat and hyperventilate just reading your elevator story. I could not handle that. As it is, I will only get into an elevator if it is almost empty. I would have been walking down 26 flights of stairs.
agghhhhhh - you have your . in China - how crappy - just one more reminder why I LOVE not getting mine anymore.
E needs to let a good cry out. Bless her heart - she sounds so precious, and perfect.
Sorry you missed her foster parents, but at least you have them on film to show E one day.
In the updated photos I have of H the back of her head is shaved - now I know why.

MsJess said...

She might not feel ready to cry in front of you, but give her some time and she will.

It's great that she was with a foster family that means she got more attention vs if she was living in an orphanage. How unfortunate that you didn't have the oppertunity to talk to her foster parents.